NEW FREEDOM
“You are going to know a new freedom, a new happiness.” – AA Big Book
When you read this, are you confused and cynical or hopeful and confirmed?
Regardless of your reaction, I get it.
There have been times in my life when it felt hard to breathe.
My situation seemed tangled, and the path forward was not known to me.
I kept trying. I kept going. But I didn’t have a vision of my future.
I just wanted some relief.
Hope is a powerful motivator for pushing through our situations.
Having a vision for your future is vital as well.
Creating a process for change with accountability is how you get there.
Dr. Henry Cloud has written extensively about the difference between hope and wishful thinking. Dr. Cloud says hope is based on engaging in a change process which includes the type of accountability offered through coaching. By contrast, wishful thinking is believing things will be different without engaging in a change process.
You can create a vision and change process to get there.
You can learn to turn down the negative influences that slow your progress.
You can learn to affirm your efforts to change.
I believe in your ability to make change.
I believe in you deserve freedom and happiness in your life.
How do people recover?
The researchers Prochaska and DiClemente were curious as to how and why some people can sustain changes in their life. They developed the “Stages of Change” model, and the first stage is “Pre-contemplation” meaning you are not really thinking about change at all. Then something happens that makes you consider making changes. This is called “Contemplation.” So, recovery starts with a change process where you become aware that things are not working for you and you consider what to do about it.
In my life, I have attempted many changes. Some successfully, some not.
The difference was linked to how much pain I was in.
The more painful a situation, the more interested I was in doing something new, the easier it was to make changes.
In other words, was I willing to do the things necessary to live differently?
Often times, clients struggle with willingness to adopt new ways of being in relationship with others. Sometimes the familiar way wins even when it is painful. The recovery process can be hard, and that’s why recovery from anything takes courage.
When you have someone coaching you and offering you support throughout the change process, you have a much better chance of success.
